Saturday, November 06, 2010


If I had need of a new online identity, Disenchanted would be my choice. Not that Disenchanted would be available - even in the fictional scenario in my head 13,694 people have already tried to claim it, and it is currently owned by a 13-year-old girl who hasn't even lived yet.

But when you've lived as long as I have, you've probably earned your disenchantment. Because life is kind of like being kicked in the teeth over and over again. (Unless you're that guy from the mattress commercial who says, "Ask me why someone who has never had an ache or a pain" loves an expensive mattress that people who actually have aches and pains can never afford. I'd personally like to kick that guy in the balls, and watch him experience pain for the first time.)

I've been thinking about life as a kick in the teeth a lot lately, and I wonder if everyone is kicked in the teeth an equal amount of times, or if some people take more kicks than others. How about celebrities? Does someone stand in for them, to take the teeth kicking on their behalf? Or does life just automatically favor the beautiful and give them even more beauty?

And what role does a positive attitude play? If you get kicked in the teeth and tell yourself it wasn't so bad and it could have been worse, does it really hurt any less? Is it easier to have a positive attitude if everything around you is already positive?

I'd appreciate it if someone could decode what I've written and get back to me with some answers.


Charlene said...

When you have a positive attitude and you get kicked in the teeth [metaphorically speaking] say, "Whew I survived that and am still alive!"

Urban Cynic said...

Life is full of kicks in the teeth; It's a rare person who goes through life without some major teeth-kicking. Some kicks are more painful than others & your head nearly comes off (ill health, loss of someone you love, losing your home) but we can just hope that the other kicks are less severe.

More positive people probably see the kicks as forceful cosmic nudges (they get harder the less you listen to the little ones)

This time last year, I had been kicked so hard in the teeth that I thought I'd need dentures, but I bore the toothache because my friend, there simply isn't anything else one can do.


Fijufic said...

be thankful it wasn't a kick aimed lower...

Life will give you all the punishment you can stand. Don't punish yourself.


MauritaMason said...

Thanks, you three. You're all pretty wise.

oddvincent said...

Yes. Please. Do kick that guy in the balls and scream: "WHERE'S YOUR MATTRESS NOW MOTHER FUCKEEEEERRR!!??"

Yeah. I hate that guy too.

As for the kicks in the teeth, you seem like you'd be quite a kicker yourself. Keep kicking back.

MauritaMason said...

Aha! That's what I haven't been doing - kicking back.

Thanks for the validation on the mattress guy...and for the laugh.

And sorry that your comments on my older posts have to be approved first. Blogger did that on its own.

wildstorm said...

I think it's time to write some more!

Anonymous said...

Hey Laura, it's CamiBami.

Love that you have a blog. Yep, getting licked in the teeth is pretty common I'd say. We all get it. Celebrities get kicked in the teeth a lot but they have amazing dentists and tooth whiteners so you'd never be able to tell.

Most people practice what I call Pretend Positivity. By having another cookie or cigaret, by reading the latest Depak Chopra book, by calling up and friend and venting, by saying to themselves "it's all going to be okay" over and over again. These are distractions that keep us from uncovering the true reason for the teeth kicking (I was an expert in this practice). We have to let ourselves feel bad, really bad, before you can face the cold, hard, ugly truth. So now, I'm a firm believer in drowning myself in my own depression, because the way up is really the way down. The bottomless pit is not bottomless, because when I'm at my lowest point is when courage kicks in, the courage that HAS to kick in when I just can't take it anymore. The courage that DECIDES I am going to take the bull by the horns, that I'm in charge and that things are going to change. So I welcome teeth-kicking, it's the way forward (if I'm willing to really feel the the pain).

MauritaMason said...

Cami! Hey! Thanks for that enlightening comment. I have a feeling you're right. My teeth got only slightly jarred today, but it made me realize I was getting lazy in my usual attempt to grow.