Friday, March 13, 2009

Just wanted you to know.

Last night, in that quiet, dreamy place between wakefulness and sleep, I came up with the phrase "Chinese Nipples." It just flashed before my eyes like a neon sign. I'm willing to give it up, pro bono, to whoever can use it.

Sorta makes me wonder if I'm getting Tourette's, though.

15 comments:

Fijufic said...

Tourette's is such a wild one. I have some great stories about it...

Marchelle said...

heh heh heh

becomingkate said...

Someone told me once that Chinese nipples were oval. he said it right after asking me if I was Asain, lol.

Simon said...

Well, I had to do a Google search on that (yes, an image search too: that goes without saying) and found this result:

China nipples, Chinese nipples Manufacturers, Buyers & Suppliers

Regrettably it turned out not to be an exotic – and possibly illegal – trade in human nipples from the Orient, but a company trading in goods made in China, in this case nipples of various kinds, from teats for babies’ feeding bottles to plumbers’ accessories.

Fascinatingly, it also yielded someone’s blog entry, which began:

“Chinese nipples” is STILL the search term that brings the most people to my blog, thus proving that the internet is, after all, just a machine that exchanges credit card numbers for a tingly feeling in the down-there.

Even I never got that one on my journal. Just lots of searches for various kinds of breasts (my favourite was ENORMOUS BREASTS – the use of capitals made it a particularly touching appeal).

LERMONTOV said...

I often dream of nipples - but my dreams are normally caucasian. I'm certain that I could work China in if I tried!

MauritaMason said...

Bobby, I'd like the hear them!

Marchelle, just another something you can use for your winter-induced tourettes.

kate, funny.

Simon, thanks for that. I'm especially excited about the prospect of more people googling me. I haven't been this excited since the phrase "girls with stuffed bellies."

Lerm, I'm certain you could. It might be beneficial if you learn a few words or phrases in Mandarin!

Labetine said...

LOL I love the comments as well as the post. :)

AK™ said...

that would something definitely getting a weird look if you woke up and shouted that out..

"CHINESE NIPPLES"

or the other one ;)

"ENORMOUS BREASTS"

LOL

MauritaMason said...

Betty, I always enjoy the comments more than my own posts.

AK, it's bad enough just having the words on my blog. I'd rather not say them out loud.

Halcyon Grace said...

Come on, SAY IT! 3 times - who knows what you might conjure up from the ether. Simon makes a great psychic advisor.

jadedj said...

I've had the very same middle of the night brain toot, only it involved chopsticks, Yaks and ENORMOUS BREASTS...sans nipples. I've used this theme on my blog on several occasions.

theredhead said...

I would be happy to take the phrase from you but I am not sure what I would do with it.

jadedj said...

For your memoirs?

Steve said...

I think this is a sign that your bisexual fantasies are starting to bubble towards the surface.

MauritaMason said...

Steve, I'm pretty sure I doubt it!